To Dave, Julie & Riley, Jack, Jackie & Cookie, Maz, Jim, Merno, the other Jim, Patti, Bruno & young’ns. I know I have half of that confused and I’ve forgotten some people but there’s something about a thought and counting. Or something.

So Merry Christmas to you and yours and a very happy and preposterous new year!

Love from Joe, Diana, Dixie & Bandit.

Thanks for visiting everyone. 

Meat Truck, originally uploaded by daveronku.

Once in awhile, I’m reminded how many things of which most of us are blissfully unaware. A couple of days ago Steve, James and I added one more thing to our list of “something I didn’t really need to know.”

Sitting at my desk, I noticed that there was a truck driver having a hell of a time backing into the alley next to the building. He kept pulling forward, backing up, pulling forward…I’ve gotten pretty used to the noises out on the street, but this was over the top.

I stood up to see what was going on and found myself looking down into the open top of a truck. It was an intriguing sight, and I couldn’t quite put my finger on what it was I was looking at. After maybe 20 seconds of staring, I audibly gasped and said “My God…is that a truckful of….meat?”

James, whom I’d been talking to before being distracted by the truck, turned back around to look. It took a few seconds for it to register for him, too; his reaction of disgust was worth the wait. We stood there and marveled at the parade of animal parts swaying back and forth as the truck driver continued trying to edge in the alley. What’s really strange is that, not more than 10 feet away, Steve continued to work as though nothing odd was going on. Tells me something about life in Highland Heights, I suppose. He finally did get up to share the view.

None of us had the presence of mind to take pictures while the meat was directly below us; just as the driver finally managed to get lined up for a straight shot back, James thought to ask if my camera was around.

I grabbed the camera and headed back to James’ office, since his window looks out the back of the building right above where the truck was headed. If you look closely at the picture above (click the picture, then click All Sizes for a larger view — and there are more pictures on Flickr), you can see a deer head and hooves, some beef spines and ribs, and lots of unidentifiable chicken parts, all neatly separated by the type of animal that was slaughtered. Or roadkilled. Who knows?

Anyway, the driver finally stopped at the far end of the alley to pick up a barrel of God knows what from who the hell knows. He put a cover on that one, so we don’t know what it was. The questions we have! What the hell was he doing with barrels of meat? Where’s he going with all that stuff? And can you imagine what that truck smells like in August?

It’s been a helluva five days.

Thursday night we came home from Joey’s Xmas concert to a fantastic discovery: the basement had flooded. Again. It’s that damned crock and sump pump, as it always is. This time it happened because the pipe the water runs through was clogged with leaves right by the drain in the back yard. Because of that clog, the water was backing up to the downspouts where it geysered out the top of the pipes to flood the backyard and to roll back down along the outside of the basement wall and back into the drain tiles, creating an endless loop. Thousands of gallons of water circulated out and back in again until the 11-year old pump finally burned out.

Thankfully, we already had a new pump waiting in the wings, and with Bruno’s help we had it installed before going to bed Thursday night. All that remained was the job of cleaning the carpet for the third time in less than two years. We used our carpet shampooing machine to suck out as much water as we could, but it really needed the pro treatment.

Our regular carpet cleaning guy couldn’t make it out until today (Monday), and we couldn’t fathom letting the water fester down there until now, so we rented a machine from the hardware store. We spent over six hours on Saturday running that thing back and forth across the floor. The smell is much improved, so the crisis is mostly past us; but it’ll be a long time - if ever - before we trust we’re not going to flood again.

Then there’s this morning. I arrived at the office to discover it’s only marginally warmer inside than out. The burner in the furnace isn’t working. I tried getting something done while working in my hat and coat, but pretty soon (despite wearing thermal socks) my feet were freezing. So here I am in Arabica, not getting anything done while waiting for the guy from Ferrato’s Heating to show up and fix the damn furnace.

And people wonder why I don’t like Decembers. I’m telling you, this month has a vendetta against me.

Jul sent this to me today. I swear to God, these should have been our wedding vows:

1. When you are sad — I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.

2. When you are blue — I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.

3. When you smile — I will know you are plotting something that I must be involved in.

4. When you are scared — I will rag on you about it every chance I get.

5. When you are worried — I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining.

6. When you are confused — I will use little words.

7. When you are sick — Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don’t want whatever you have.

8. When you fall — I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.

9. This is my oath…. I pledge it to the end.

‘Why?’ you may ask; ‘because you are my friend’. Friendship is like peeing your pants: everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth.

Maybe that’s a little extreme. If it’s not love, it’s serious committed like. This keyboard is way cooler than I expected it to be.

I really wanted to get the wireless one. I mean, look at the white cord snaking out of this thing, plus the white cord for the mouse. I’d have gotten it if it had a numeric keyboard, but it doesn’t, and I use those keys way too often not to have them.

I borrowed James’ last weekend when I had to transpose a website into Word (don’t ask) and I was struggling with the board I was using. I noticed an immediate speed and accuracy increase. It’s kind of surprising, really. The keys are based on those they use on the MacBooks (but not the MacBook Pros), and I’m not a big fan of laptop keyboards. I usually go for really clacky old-school keys (like those on the Tactile Pro or the old IBM Model M), and these are neither clacky nor old-school. And Apple hasn’t made a decent keyboard since the venerated Apple Extended Keyboard back in the 90s.
Anyway, I was so impressed I bought one this week. It’s been three days of soft-typing bliss. Yes, that’s both geeky and sad.