Dec 04 2007
With Joy in His Heart
I want to wake up like Riley.
Most mornings, it takes sixty-three minutes for me to get out of bed. That’s right, seven snooze cycles. It’s gotten to the point that I set the alarm to wake me an hour before I really have get up just so I’ll make it to the office at a reasonable time. (For me, that’s somewhere around 9:30. Yes, I know.)
I don’t know what it is. It’s not like I dread the day; most of my work days are fine. Sure, I put out a lot of fires, metaphorically speaking, but my entire career’s been like that and after 20 years of fire-outputting I’m pretty used to it. I may even get off on it a little bit. And I don’t have trouble sleeping, not really, so that’s not it. But it just takes me a really long time to drag my ass out from under the covers.
Compare that to the now 82-lb. puppy in the house. He and Jul get up and barrel downstairs for breakfast, then he dashes into the back yard to scare the birds and eat God knows what out of the flower beds. Back in the house, he barrels back up the stairs and bounds into the room to give me a big wet slurp with his half-acre tongue; on really rambunctious days he leaps over me to land on the mattress next to me, give the covers a playful tug, then bounds back off the bed to go rocketing back downstairs. “DAVE IT’S ANOTHER DAY THAT I’M NOT LIVING ON THE STREET OH MY GOD THIS IS SO AWESOME!!!” BOOM BOOM Boom boom … boom … boom. Riley is the canine equivalent to this guy in the morning.
I mean, it’s totally awesome to see that kind of enthusiasm.
But it’s only 7:42, and I have two more snooze cycles to enjoy.
I’m sitting here at 7:36 am reading this knowing I’ve been up an hour and 36 minutes and Dave is about to hit the snooze again. But at 3:30 pm, I’ll be able to go home where I get that same crazy stuff from our 42 lbs Maggie. Dogs are so much better then cats.
CORRECTION: I’ve been up for 2 HOURS and 36 minutes!
He’s a riot!
Cats are useless. They scratch the furniture and bring dead things home and try to BRING THEM IN THE HOUSE! Do they try to warn you when there is something wrong in the house, or there is a stranger in the yard? No, they lick themselves and roll over. Is there unconditional love and a undying need to make people happy? no. They scratch the furniture up somemore and when you, oh say, throw a heavvy object at them they look at you like they’re alowed to fuck up the couch or carpet.
Plus they can’t tell you to get the ladder because the ball is on the roof.
I’m buying you ˙this.
Jim
Link didn’t work.
This: http://www.hammacher.com/publish/74132.asp
Laughed out loud when I saw that alarm clock! Technology is great.
Would I be donning my Captain Obvious hat if I pointed out the real culprit is Julie? Riley would lay in bed all morning if Julie would. I know that’s how it is at our 2550 square foot dog house with human butlers.
They’ve done just that, Joe. Riley’s quite content to sleep as long as we do; but once he’s up, he’s UP!
You get Dave one of those clocks, and I bet it only goes off once. Then Riley has a chew toy with a satisfying crunch.
OR, when Dave catches it he throws it through the window.
Face it Dave, your as much a morning person as I am, or Patti is, or Dylan is……….
Oh btw thanks for putting……
MOR- NING-S HERE, the morning’s here……
into my head for the rest of forever.
LOL! One of the kids saw that alarm clock in a gadget catalogue, and told me that is what I need. I’m sooo not a morning person. The snooze alarm is my friend.
I want to meet Riley! He sounds so cute! Still bummed about T-giving snow.