Feb 18 2008
All but unbearable
I’m watching “Medium” right now on NBC. If Patricia Arquette doesn’t win a Golden Globe for Worst Actress in a Lousy Drama, something is really wrong with the world. The worst part about the show (besides the goofy reluctant-psychic-solves-crime schtick) is the whininess of Arquette’s character. Tonight, they figured out a way to make her whinier; they made her deaf (Oh my God, I’m deaf! I can’t hear you! I love my girls! I love my husband! I know what happened to your daughter, but I can’t hear! Waaaaaah!). Oh my God, please, make this episode end.
I was wondering, do you have one of these http://computerselectronicscenter.com/main/images/rm-y171.gif
on the arm of your chair, or perhaps an end table?
Ha, Ha. Now that’s funny right there. Riley probably swallowed it.
She has already taken the award for most unflattering hairdo in a dramatic role 2 years running. I do not watch the show; I have gleaned this from the ads.
This is what you get for not watching CSI Miami. Stainless steel labs, pipettes, Hummers, chain of custody bags, Emily Proctor — it’s reality TV at its finest.
I prefer watching Joel McHale imitate Horatio on The Soup.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=hv7rIVU37jM&feature=related
Hey, I have a remote (it looks like this), and I watch The Soup.
Julie likes “Medium.” Mom says it’s her favorite show. I was sitting in my chair surfing while the show was on. It was excruciating.
7:54 am, what are you doing up so early?
Really, I think they look for the most UNattractive women for medium. Then they make them even less attractive. Now, they don’t have to be total eye candy (though, it certainly helps. Why do you think people watched ‘Friends’ after Chandler got fat, unfunny and married to the increasingly neurotic Monica) but with Patricia Arquette already uglying up the screen, do ya think the addition of Angelica Houston, linebacker for the New York Giants, was a great move?
Bet they make her take off that Super Bowl ring before filming.
I agree with the Friends rational. They must have been really cute AND connected to swing the largest apartment in Greenwich Village, while neither Rachel nor Monica had a steady job for like 2 seasons. My brother’s apartment in Manhattan is about the size of Seinfeld’s, and he supposedly had some cash on the show.
This is also why we like Lost. All the ugly people except Hurley died in the plane crash. Whew! Convenient!
And if the women of Medium don’t start staying away from craft services, they’ll have to rename the show…..all together now……..
LARGE!
LOL LOL LOL
Thank you, Jackie and I will be here all week. Whadda team. Try the fish, tip those hard working servers and drive safe.
“Angelica Houston, linebacker for the New York Giants”
Now THAT made me laugh quite loudly. The Medium…Large thing was quite entertaining as well.
Doesn’t she look like she is wearing shoulder pads? Maybe she should’ve worn a helmet while sombody beat her about the head with an ugly tree too.
Now that’s funny riychar, I don’t care who y’are.
How does the reproduction of Anthony Quinn (with presumably a woman) result in a woman uglier than himself? And speaking of helmuts, I think she fashions her hairstyle after the aforementioned headgear.
I have to stick up for Patricia A though - I think she’s normal - I’ll give you she’s a tad whiney. She’s a lot cuter than Horatio - howdy doody meets Don Johnson.
But he’s got……the sunglasses.
“Looks like our Cuban gun runner friend is up to his old tricks, Horatio.”
“Well, it’s a good thing, lieutenant, that we have……..a few tricks of our own.”
(Cue The Who)
YEAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
Miss Morose Medium lady looks like she’s low on fiber. And the CSI people love their work and are always happy to be there when beautiful people get killed. No one dies on the crapper on CSI Miami. Medium lady looks like she’s working for the health insurance. But she’s psychic, so she knows I was going to say that. That faraway look she gets when thinking about a case? She is wishing she was on CSI, wearing linen pants, far away from her husband with perma-bedhead.
Other Jim you’re really making me want to tune it to MediumLarge just to see the husband lol.
The Husband with Perma-bedhead is almost, but not quite, as whiny as Helmet-head Psychic. Even the girls are whiny. Look honey! It’s the Whinerstons!
Jackie, picture the real-life version of Shaggy (Scooby Doo) - which also describes his hair. The most annoying member of the Whinerstons, without a doubt, is the middle daughter. And talk about hair, or fuzz or whatever that is - they must use a screwdriver in an socket to get that look.
Bahahaha. Now that’s MUST SEE TV!!!
Really though, I can’t believe there are 16 responses to whiney Medium/Large and only four for the Bucktoothed Dick.
What’s WRONG with you people???
And PS - when I finished that post I sat here at my computer with a big Marty Feldman grin on my face.
You remember the one in Young Frankenstein? Huge closed mouth grin from ear to ear?
My, what big eyes you have. Are you wearing a black robe with hood?
Medium needs deconstructing. Bucktoothed Dick speaks volumes just by existing.
Maybe they could do a CSI/Medium crossover, where Whiney Psychic travels to Miami, is shot by a swarthy Latino gang member, and spends the episode in a coma. “We want her to wake up, lieutenant……to justice.” YEAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!
“What knockers”
“Why thank you Doctor”
And while she is in her coma she has a vision of something that she can’t quite make out. She sees animals being smuggled into the country.
Horatio, not wanting to use the ample supply of table lights in the room uses his flashlight holding it up close to his ear, finds little paw prints in the blood. “I know these tracks… there’re from a little known species. They from no other then…the Buck Tooth Dick” YEAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
But just how are they being smuggled in? Hidden in the middle daughters hair? Under Abby Normal’s black robe? “Perhaps, lieutenant, it’s a back door job……deliverys only in the rear.” OOOWWWWWCCHHHHH! I mean YYYEAAHHHHHHH!!
OH MAN! I just heard Dave laugh all the way over here!!!
This was fun.
So Dave, what other show do you watch that you don’t like?
I miss Joe. Apparently TV hasn’t made it to Canada yet. Or Medium lady is his aunt or something.
ahahahahahaha
you bust me up
Maybe Canadians have higher standards for TV shows. CSI Toronto or Thunder Bay or whatever. “Horatio, I think he was stampeded by a herd of Moose”….YYYEEAAAAAAAA…..
rofl, y’all are killing me. YYYYEEEEAAAAAAA.
CSI Vancouver: “He’s dead, eh?”
“Ya. He’s dead. Cracked over the head with an empty Moosehead while chasing beaver.”
“Shame. Wonder if the killer has any beer left? We should find him.”
“Those mountains sure are pretty. Let’s go hiking.”
We’ll catch the killer, lieutenant………some other time,eh?”
YEAHHHHHH!!!!!
And of course there’s Medium-Canadianstyle…Mrs. Whinerston works for the Mounties. Hey, maybe the mounting in itself will stop the whining, eh …YEAHHHHHHH!!!
CSI Wood Buffalo (look it up, it’s there) hmmm, Do you think he froze to death, eh? Not possible, he was wearing a tuque. He was….murdered.YEEAAAAAAAAAA!
CSI Buffalo - “dust for prints eh? but first - Beef on Weck”
Did someone say Beef on Weck?
(cricket noise….)
No one here. Not interested in commenting on this thread at all. Shhh.
“That’s a lot of stab wounds. I’d say someone had a beef with him….a beef on Weck….” Yeeeahhh….. too tired to hit shift.
Why is Weck capitalized? Isn’t it just a bun from Buffalo?
Hi Joe. Sorry you’re hungry. Obviously, you’re not on Medium.
Maybe Joe is whipping up a Cock ‘n Bull stew, or fried woodchuck! Wouldn’t your mouth just water over a bucktoothed dick fricasse???
Jackie, are you happy the bucktoothed dick got more print??
“bucktoothed dick fricasse”
bahahahahahahahahahahahahaah!
yep my dear NTPWF. I’m very happy.
i’m reading all this and all I really have to say is
who is NTPWF?
oh and…
Medium lady (and her hair) annoy the crap out of me.
Poor Patti in the dark.
And did anybody notice Joe only woke up when Weck was mentioned? hmmmm?
NTPWF: Nobody knows the ghostwriter but I heard they were working on a sequel to CSI Vancouver; the Whinerstons go to Miami.
It’s called CSI Vancouver; the Whinerstons go to Amish Town.
In this episode, they find Jebidiah dead in the field with little footprints all over him… could it be that pesky Bucktoothed Dick again?
YEAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!
“It’s the English that brought those Bucktoothed Dicks into our community” said Elder Yoder. “We don’t hold grudges, we just want them to keep their Dicks to themselves.”
Especially their “spotted dicks”.
Now look that one up! lol
Spotted…
sorry, forgot the link…
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,32970,00.html
now that’s just plain silly…spotted Richard.
Come on Patty…you know me. Hint: my “name” is an acronym.
BAHAhahaha. I’m thinking “since when is my name an acronym?” two seconds later I’m like “OHHHH. NTPWF….”
doy doy doy
I think I heard the honking all the way over here!!! JACKIE: Juicy Appetizing Chocolate Kiss In Egg-custard …. almost as good as Spotted Dick!!
Maybe a shot will clear up that Spotted Dick problem. Or is Spotted Dick the dreaded precursor to bucktoothed dick?
“Juicy Appetizing Chocolate Kiss In Egg-custard”
Whaddya mean ALMOST as good as spotted Dick? lol
So true. So true. For both of us of course!
Well, as much as I like you Jackie, I kind of go for the…well, uh, you know - spotted or otherwise :))
OH YUCK!! NOT WHAT I MEANT AT ALL…
: )
I could stand to hear a little more.
well, i figured that much
Patti-o didja ever figure it out????